ABUSE AND RECOVERY BOOKS

The following Christian-centered books on abuse and recovery will help you through the process of understanding your own or someone else's abuse and lead you through the recovery process.

   The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse
by Dan Allender

Almost everyone knows a victim of childhood sexual abuse; it has no religious or social boundaries. And sexual abuse is probably the most ''soul-deadening'' trauma there is. For adult victims, here is a way out of the rage, fear, and confusion. For their spouses, families, friends, and counselors, here are specific ways you can help the healing process. With Christ, there is indeed hope for the wounded heart.

  In Our Backyard: A Christian Perspective on Human Trafficking in the United States - by Nita Belle

There are 100,000 children in America being sold and bought for sex, which the average age of entry into this evil industry being 13 years old. 

 In Our Backyard invites the reader in to the lives of human trafficking victims, survivors and the traffickers themselves with true stories. These stories not only inform the reader, but also take them quickly through a well-documented crash course about human trafficking--better described as modern-day slavery--in the United States. A quick read which includes study questions for small groups, In Our Backyard could change your life and save lives around you.

Changes That Heal: How to Understand the Past to Ensure a Healthier Future
by Henry Cloud

Originally published as When Your World Makes No Sense, this best-selling self-help book points people who feel "stuck" toward emotional and spiritual healing. They'll discover how to bond to God and to others, establish appropriate personal boundaries, sort out issues of good and bad, and accept full responsibility for their lives as believers!

The Wounded Spirit
By Frank Peretti

From the best-selling author of This Present Darkness comes a page-turner packed with the stuff of spiritual warfare---but this time, it isn't fiction. It's fact! Sharing the passionate story of his own traumatic childhood, Peretti reveals his personal hurts and challenges believers to become "wounded healers," protecting those weaker than themselves.

Attachments: Why You Love, Feel, and Act the Way You Do
by Drs. Tim Clinton & Gary Sibcy

Why is it so difficult to connect with, or even get along with, certain people especially the ones you care about the most?
You can't seem to put your finger on it, but something is getting in the way. You've invested yourself in relationships time and again and time and again you've been disappointed, discouraged, or deeply hurt. Yet you know what you want: a fulfilling, safe, loving relationship with your spouse, your child, your parents, your siblings, your friends.
So how do you create satisfying relationships? Where do you begin?
Drs. Tim Clinton and Gary Sibcy believe that, for each of us, our present relationships are influenced by our first "attachments" or bonds with people in early childhood. Consequently, understanding your pattern of relating to others what the authors call your "attachment style" is the cornerstone for building satisfying relationships with the people you love.
In this book, Clinton and Sibcy help you identify and define your first attachments. They then lead you to discover...

-how to get free from the mistakes of the past
- guidance for connecting with those closest to you
- practical tools to help you avoid negative patterns of relating
-what kind of people best nurture your soul
- your personal pathway to healthy bonding with God and others

Life is short. Attachments will take you on a journey of self-discovery. A journey toward learning to love others in godly, selfless ways. A journey that will, in turn, help you receive the love you've always dreamed of.

Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren't
by Henry Cloud & John Townsend

 Too many of us have invested ourselves into relationships that left us deeply wounded. We've been abandoned or taken advantage of, and left with little to show for what we've given. We've lost our sense of security and personal value in the process. And what's worse, we tend to either repeat the same mistakes of judgment over and over . . . Or else lock the doors of our hearts entirely and throw away the key. Why do we choose the wrong people to get involved with? Is it possible to change? And if so, where does one begin? Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend offer solid guidance for making safe choices in relationships, from friendships to romance. They help identify the nurturing people we all need in our lives, as well as ones we need to learn to avoid. Safe People will help you to recognize 20 traits of relationally untrustworthy people. Discover what makes some people relationally safe, and how to avoid unhealthy entanglements. You'll learn about things within yourself that jeopardize your relational security. And you'll find out what to do and what not to do to develop a balanced, healthy approach to relationships.

  Toxic Faith 
by Stephen Arterburn & Jack Felton

If you know people who believe they are serving God but are driven by despair, guilt, and legalism, they may be suffering from toxic faith. Arterburn and Felton discuss the warning signs of this problem, outline a 12-step program for healing, and describe how parents can foster healthy faith in their children.

Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse, The: Recognizing and Escaping Spiritual Manipulation and False Spiritual Authority Within the Church
By David Johnson & Jeff VanVonderen / Bethany House Publishers

No one should leave church feeling manipulated, controlled, shamed, or condemned. But places of shelter and encouragement can become abusive if spiritual leaders begin to use their authority to meet their needs for importance, power, or spiritual gratification. Here you'll discover how to identify an abusive church and also how to break free from its destructive legalism. Topics covered include:

• How spiritual abuse develops--and why those under its grip often don't see it

• The subtle ways that leaders and systems "hook" and control believers, robbing them of their joy in Christ

• Scriptural help in recognizing healthy spiritual relationships

• Effective strategies for escaping abusive situations

Insightful, practical, and solidly grounded in Scripture, this book has what you need to recover a grace-filled relationship with God and His church.

Hiding from Love
by John Townsend

A workbook to help readers explore their hiding patterns and discover the freedom of connected relationships When we experience emotional injury, fear, shame, or pride, our first impulse is to hide the hurting parts of ourselves from God, others, and even ourselves. The problem is that when we hide our injuries and frailties, we run from the very things we need to heal and mature. What served as protection for a child becomes a prison to an adult. This workbook helps readers explore the hiding patterns they have developed and guides them toward the healing grace and truth that God has built into safe, connected relationships with himself and others.

The Lies We Believe
by Dr Chris Thurman

This newly repackaged edition examines the lies people tell themselves that damage emotional health, relationships, and spiritual life. Psychologist Dr. Chris Thurman guides the reader through part one that identifies the different areas of self-lies, religious lies, marital lies, distortion lies, and worldly lies. Part Two delves into the issues of what is truth, and Part Three deals with how to live the truth, ultimately revealing the freedom that can only come from one thing-believing and telling themselves the truth. An extremely easy-to-follow guide filled with comprehensive workbook exercises, this edition is a way to help people experience the emotional health, intimate relationships, and spiritual fulfillment they are seeking.

Always Daddy's Girl
by H. Norman Wright

No matter how old she is, a woman's relationship with her father-whether it was wonderful or painful-had an impact on the person she is today. Her relationship with men, her career and her feelings about herself have all been shaped by her father, whether she realizes it or not. Now, with the help of noted marriage and family counselor H. Norman Wright, women can begin to understand how their fathers had a profound effect on their emotions and behaviors as adults.

Boundaries: When to Say YES, When to Say NO, To Take Control of Your Life
by Henry Cloud & John Townsend

Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy, balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. In other words, boundaries define who we are and who we are not. Boundaries impact all areas of our lives: Physical boundaries help us determine who may touch us and under what circumstances. Mental boundaries give us the freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions. Emotional boundaries help us to deal with our own emotions and disengage from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others. Spiritual boundaries help us to distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our Creator. Often, Christians focus so much on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limits and limitations. When confronted with their lack of boundaries, they ask: Can I set limits and still be a loving person? What are legitimate boundaries? What if someone is upset or hurt by my boundaries? How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy or money? Aren't boundaries selfish? Why do I feel guilty or afraid when I consider setting boundaries?

Healing is a Choice
by Stephen Arterburn

The power to heal-physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually-is in God's hands. But the choice to be healed is yours. Everyone, at some level, needs healing. In this book, Stephen Arterburn outlines ten choices crucial to receiving healing and ten lies that can prevent you from making them. You will find the wholeness God desires for you in a practical and prayerful way through this book.